I stared out the window, eyeing the palm trees swaying on the beach, the wind sighing through the leaves in front of a gorgeous blood red sunset. Curled up in my comfy camping chair, I started to write in my journal, finally getting a moment alone to release my thoughts.

“It’s been a long couple of weeks, but finally, I’m free. Knowing it was only a matter of time until I was out of my mother’s judging eyes and controlling nature made living with her almost unbearable. Finally, I’m free to pursue my own dreams and goals; I’m not confined by my mother’s idea of what’s wrong and right.”

I put the pen down, and glanced out the window again, marveling at the dying sun’s beauty. It was amazing, sitting here alone in a dorm, on a near deserted island, miles and miles away from any other civilization. I'd lived in the inner city, and moved out to the suburbs, and now I was, miles and miles away from my past.

“I’ve always been overshadowed by my siblings. I’ve longed to get away. Longed to be alone. Longed to pursue music, to lose myself in music, and not have anyone say anything against it.”

At this I got up, and strode over to the electric piano I had brought to
school. As my fingers sunk into the keys, I shook her head. The touch and feel of the electric piano was all wrong; there was no resistance, no give and take. I could paint pictures, vibrant with color tones on my piano back home. Still, I carried on, the beautiful haunting melody of my favorite Chopin nocturne escaping through the open door out into the hallway.

My ears perked up at the familiar tone of a piano. It didn't have an electric buzz in the background, meaning that it wasn't a recording. Someone was actually playing this beautiful song. I closed my eyes and just stood there, in the middle of the hallway, drowning myself in that beautiful song. It brought back memories. Memories of my first day at Shokushu, being drawn to a wonderful piano player and ending up becoming her lover. Maybe I had a thing for Pianos. I made up my mind and retook control of my body. I began walking towards the source of the music, glancing in from door to door.

I continued playing, pouring lingering sadness, exhaustion, and loneliness through the sounds of the piano. The energy swelled, and my fingers became a flurry of movement on the keyboard. While I swayed to the music, I was completely captivated in the creation of this representation of my inner feelings.

And magically, almost unnoticeable, yet impossible to ignore, the music changed, calmed, and as though the sun peered through the clouds obliterating the shadows and storms, and grand chords sang out of the--

I stopped playing. glancing up, I stared at the attractive smiling girl in the doorway. Half of her immediately grimaced: "Oh great," I thought, "another one of those shallow, materialistic girls who care more for their looks and makeup than what's truly important." I had seen many of these girls at the school. But somehow, this one seemed at least a little different, despite the pretty face. Masking my initial judgement, I flashed her a warm smile, saying, "oh, hi! you surprised me!"

I shook my head, coming out of my mesmerized state. I had finally found her after peeking into several rooms. In one of them, there had been a girl laying on the floor, sleeping soundly, some sort of smoke coming up from an ashtray laying on the ground beside her. The smell had been tentalizing and made me feel slightly light headed. Little did I know I had actually inhaled a very specific aroma, that a certain monster would unleash upon an unsuspecting girl to dull her senses and make her comply much more easily. And now, about three doors down, the poor girl was being raped senseless by the monster.

I dazedly blinked a few times, just realizing that I had been staring at the girl playing the piano. "Oh, sorry for peaking. I was just listening to your song. It was very well played." I cleared my throat, blushing in embarrassment.

While maintaining a warm smile, I eyed the new girl acutely, curious as to whether her interest was genuine, or driven by some other motive. Her cheeks were slightly pink, and I could tell she was embarrassed for her intrusion. "ah, it doesn't matter. I would have closed the door if i didn't want visitors," she answered somewhat apathetically. " Thanks for the compliment though. Aren't Chopin's works amazing? I just love tenderness and emotion you can feel in his music. The way the tension builds, and-- oh, its just amazing."

With a slight blush, I interrupted myself, "oh, I'm sorry, I never introduced myself. My name's Teague. What's yours?"

"Tian. Nice to meet you. And yes, you're right, it is amazing. Do you mind if I listen for a bit longer?" She was also beginning to glow a soft pink. But why was I feeling so hot inside? The answer was obvious, it was the gas I had inhaled earlier, but I didn't know that.

"not at all. It's nice to meet you, Tian." I replied, though feeling I never played as well when I had even a single person as an audience. I backed up a few measures in the piece, to help the original energy return. Yet, try as I might, the connection I had felt only moments ago was broken. While to anyone else's ears, the music certainly sounded beautiful and well-played, to me , the chords fell flat, and lacked the liveliness I had intended to give them.

With an exasperated sigh, I finished the song, for a moment, staring off onto the empty music stand. With a start, I glanced back up at Tian, saying, "well there it is, Nocturne in Eb op. 9... my favorite... Do you play any musical instrument?"

"I also used to play the piano. But my parents canceled my lessons when my teacher said I had no hope in actually learning anything useful. But they then decided to start me on swimming lessons. I guess that was my way of getting away from the outside world. Its like, whenever I'd submerge myself underwater, I'd be free from the restrictions of reality. I could swim around freely, even turn myself upside down without needing any special skills. It was like being able to fly. But now, here, I'm afraid to even leave the school. The pools are like hunting grounds for monsters, the beach is no better. The forest is where the things live." I sighed loudly, blushing even more strongly. Why was I pouring my heart out to this girl? Its not like she could do anything about it. It just seemed like every subject rolled into another and I ended up talking about monsters. Did she even know about them? Well, she did now. "I--I'm sorry, I didn't mean to spill my guts out on you. I'll leave, I can tell you're uncomfortable."

"Monsters??" I thought, "what is this girl talking about? She must be a nutter..."

But there was something sincere about the emotions spilling out of this obviously distraught girl. Perhaps the girl was crazy, but she was an honest crazy. "No, don't leave. Most people are made uncomfortable by sheer honesty and openness. I relish it," I said. Pausing, I was unsure how to proceed. Half of me wanted to help the girl, but the other half wasn't sure where to begin. "Monsters in the water? Are you sure you didn't just imagine them?"

I sighed as I got the obvous response. That I was crazy. "Listen to me, don't you think I'd know what was raping me? Yes, thats right, I said rape. These things latch onto your arms and legs with their tentacles or whatever else they can find, and they start fucking you. Then, after you've lost all senses of who you are and you finally give in to the pleasure, you want more. And they give you more. Until you can't take any more and pass out. Thats what they do. And they enjoy it." I scowl slightly, shaking my head as I think back on what I had just said. No wonder she thinks I'm crazy.

Blank shock caused my eyes to glaze over and grow wide. rape? I felt as though the room dropped a few degrees. Not sure that Tian was crazy, yet absolutely certain that she at least thought she was telling the truth, I couldn't decide what to believe. What kind of place was this? I hadn't really gone out of her way to meet new people, yet now that I thought about it, the awkwardness of many of the older girls did seem odd. I guess i'd have to see her side out for now. "Doesn't anyone DO anything about this? certainly you've told the staff, a friend, a parent," I said, exasperated. "If nothing else, why don't you just leave?"

"First of all, we're not allowed to leave. No letters ever actually get out of the school. I've sent at least three letters and I've gotten very casual responses, replying to everything in my letter except the monsters. And don't you think somebody would of that of telling the staff? Trust me, we have. And they did nothing but call us crazy. Hell, they even sent us to the basement for their definition of detention, which is actually getting tied up in leathery straps and fucked senseless by either another monster or a staff member with nothing better to do." I stood up and opened the window slightly. I gestured with my arm, showing her the entire forest that stood below us. "Thats where they dwell, the monsters. For some reason these things are allowed to come here, fuck us senseless and let go to walk freely." I looked up at the sunset, the red glow emanating like an evil eye staring down at us. I once thought they were beautiful, back in Florida. Those times had changed.

I stood up. "You're lying. this is all just some messed up joke," I accused, despite knowing that this girl wouldn't lie about something like this. only minutes ago, I had been excited, happy to begin a new life, one outside the influence of her mother, where I could finally pursue what I truly wanted. And now, if what Tian said was true, I wasn't free at all; I was condemned.

Overcome by emotion, I slumped in the camping chair by the window, tears welling in my eyes. "...I know you're not lying..." I said after a pause, "no one would lie about something as terrible as that." Staring out the window into the red sun, I wondered how a place so beautiful could harbor such a terrible secret. Turning to face Tian, my eyes glistening with her tears, I asked, "Isn't there anything we can do?"

"Well, those of us that aren't sluts and don't enjoy being ravaged by monsters, can do the next best thing. We can find somebody to love, somebody to seek comfort in. Somebody we can run to after we wake up naked in a closet, a pool house or even a green house and snuggle up beside them and let all of the tears flow out. You'd be amazed how sensitive so many of the girls here can be. And no, nobody will make fun of you for kissing another girl or even having sex with her. And if you're wondering how I know, thats because I, myself, am a lesbian." I stopped talking, stepped away from the window and slid off my school shirt. Underneath I had a loose undershirt. It was so much more comfortable then the tight and shapely uniform. I sat down beside her, on the chair's arm rest. I put my arms around her shoulders, gently laying my head on her shoulder. "Although we're not strong enough to cope with the monsters, we can, however, find comfort in each other and hope that we graduate sooner rather then later." I stared at the sunset also, trying to comprehend its meaning.

The force of Tian's words caught me off guard. I was surprised to find myself comforted and consoled by the trust demonstrated by Tian's openness and physical contact. thrown off by the girls forwardness, I paused a moment, unsure what to do.

Having been part of the alternative crowd in her high school, I wasn't closed minded to alternative sexualities, though I had never questioned my own. Still, there was no doubt about it, the girl beside me was unnaturally beautiful, exuding an aura of comfort and compassion, though clothed plainly in a simple undershirt falling loosely on her petite body.

With a sigh, I accepted her new acquaintance's comfort, tilting my head slightly, gently returning pressure. Still unsure how to proceed, I mumbled a clumsy, "thank you for sharing that..." I paused, a little, to calm my breathing, and started up again, "I guess that's all we have, isn't it... each others support? It's something they can't take away, if we don't let them."