Tears formed in those big wet eyes. An soon me fingers wee stroking the soft cheeks, rubbing the tears away as me own ‘gain to flow. Her arms about me neck an shoulders pulling her body tight gainst me, Clutching as if I wuz a raft in a storm tossed sea. An after a tear or two me own arms snaked there way ‘bout her quietly sobbing body.

Each of us reliving the past in our own way an drawing comfort from the contact of a comrade in arms, yet for me there wuz greater trouble. The nasty thoughts I’d had as I became aroused. Acutally aroused in the rape of me body. The thoughts of using this poor girl for me own pleasures as the creature of our shared nightmare used me. I had the unclean thoughts of her pale naked flesh ‘gianst me, undulating in our mutual joy. Oh, lord what had I become in that moment. Wuz this a test of me will?

Darkness had taken hold of me. Brought on even more so by here thanks…her confessions of the lord working through me an to think the selfishness I had felt in her moment of need. What had started as a valiant an noble thought had ended with me almost doing more harm … far more than the actual nightmare. No shower would help me feel cleaner at this moment. The guilt wuz more than I could bear as the tears flowed anew.

“Michael, oh lord…as god it me witness, yes I did want to help you. But…..ummm… I failed me slef an you. I fear….I…..I am not as noble as you may think….I….” oh the shame an humiliation of what I had felt in our moment of need.

“I wanted you…physically as the thing in our dreams did that….that to us….I ….” I looked into those large green eyes, wet with fear an happiness. An faltered for a moment.

“Please forgive me Michael…you are the one that is good an noble. I, perhaps the strain of me wife, me partner gone missing this last month…the …oh god no….the way you felt against me as….I am vile an wicked for what I thought while I dreamed in that nightmare of a world… What I ‘gain to feel no girl should feel when sum thing like that happens….an …an I wuz about to make it worse with you. I like sum things perhaps too much an have grown needful of sum of the pleasure of life….oh …Michael, please forgive me for what I thought…what I wuz about to do. What even now I sum times think when I see the quiver in yur lips an wish to give comfort. A comfort with me own lips….an evil comfort.

As the lord in heaven is me witness I started out to try an protect, to be noble. But….but I thought impure things, rotten things, an even if I wuz to kiss you know I’m not sure how chaste an comforting it would be…I don’t want you to go away mad at me, but I fear it…I truly do. I fear both options. I fear your comfort an your displeasure with me. Cause I have done wrong an wronged you while trying to be good an pure because I am not. OH god…even now I fight off the animal within who’s very urges are lustful an wrong. So sorry….so…so sorry I am not what you thought” I hang me head in shame an disgust as the sob wracks me body an bounces her petite an light frame like a kite in a tempest.

I am a failure in gods test of me will….. There can be no other explanation.

Sable was awake and could see what was going on between Cassie and Michael she would frown knowing she was un able to help her roomie and friend as she sighs and walks up to them "hey is she ok?"

Sondra growled in anger as she bit down even harder on the horrid thing in her mouth, though it seemed to do little to harm or even distract the creature, who continued to mercilessly rape the enraged woman and her fellow classmates. And then the purple-skinned beast let out an eerie howl that threatened to shatter her ear drums.

The furious blonde thrashed about violently as she persistently struggled to free herself from the alien monster's iron grip. This did her about as much good as biting on the thing's tentacle had, and Sondra was forced to endure the horrid sqid-thing's tireless onslaught.

And then it finally happened. Sondra fought herself with every ounce of will she had during the so-called god's sexual assault, and yet in the end her body betrayed her as it always did during these attacks. Sondra came, and she came violently. She through her head back and screamed, the sound muffled by the tentacle raping her throat. He back was arched as entire body shook and shuddered throughout her intense climax. Orgasmic fluids exploded out her body in a flood, pussy juice and what could only be called monster cum pouring out of her quivering, tight-clenching pussy...

And then, even quicker than it began, the creature's assault had ended, the bizarre sky and even stranger city had vanished as if it had never been there. Sondra grunted as she landed on the ground, rolling her body to lessen the force of impact. Tears came to the trembling blonde's eyes as she looked all around her, at the girls she had failed to protect from the horrible little shit that had violated their bodies and raped their minds.

She had never been so ashamed of herself as she had that moment. "I'm sorry...I failed you, Linny...I failed all of you..." Head held low in shame, Sondra got to her feet and slowly trudged off to the showers, where she could clean herself off and hopefully have some time to herself for a while. She was not fit to be in their presence, and certainly not in her wife's...

((forgive me but, I'm going to switch styles see if i can manage it))

I looked upon the girl whom had helped me through my time of need. listened as her heart bled upon my ears. Her red locks and fair skin contrary to what she was trying to say to me. to my eyes right now she was an angelic being. All I cared about was her though Sable had approached I didn't hear her right away. The warm tears wiped away from my face When she finished speaking I felt no recourse but, to tell the truth to her.

"I don't care; I really don't Cassie. All that matters is you helped me; you got passed those dark thoughts and did what you though was right fought them with every fiber of your soul. I'm sure the lord would forgive you for having human thoughts. These thoughts were created for a reason, to take us from reality when horrors befall us."

I took a deep breath when she mentioned her wife hade been missing for a time. it hit me that she was hurting; I understood more than I should. To be honest I wasn't a religious woman but, I understood it enough to try and comfort her as best I could.

"All have their flaws but, please don't be hard on yourself just for wanting to touch someone intimately."

I paused for a minute my mind muling over the mention of a comforting kiss before finally i decided.

"That thought of our lips comforting each other. If you'd like you can follow through with that and I won't say a word. I've been helped a bit with my fear of germs. I see no problem with such a simple gesture."

it was then my ears heard sable's voice, my roommate, a kind girl my own size I'd forgiven her time & time again now for what she'd done to me when we'd first met.

"I'll live... thanks for caring Sable."

She wuz too good to me. A kind hearted soul that knew now bounds in her ability to now comfort me, the person that had started to do the worst a girl could do to another. Dirt clung to me an my clothes. The small of sweat an heat…an lingering under it all the aroma of arousal, of sex. The nightmare too vivid to have been a mere dream….but it had to be….didn’t it?

“Sable, that is a pretty name….in my dream you called after Michael….perhaps it wuz you that made me move in me dream…yes….yes I think so. Thank you.” The really scary part wuz she too seemed to have shared the same dream. I could see it on her face, but….but the same shame an revulsion I felt didn’t seem to be there…in fact. It wuz as if she an Michael had sum thing going an I wuz a third wheel., the thing I did not want to be.

“Th….thanks….you are too good. I really mean it Michael. Good, attractive, smart….a girl or boy could do no wrong by having you in their arms. I… I get lost in this place sometimes. I miss me folks….I miss me dog. It’s the girls like you, the ones that can hug an give comfort that are a real treasure in this world.”

I looked at her….an really…really wanted to kiss her. I felt unsatisfied now, like a part of me wuz missing an unfulfilled after the nightmare. Like I had needed to reach the point of bliss an had somehow failed me self for not having done so. Perhaps that wuz what made me feel even more dirty. A dirty lil tramp who would have taken this sweet child an used her selfishly. She wuz the better woman for being willing to forgive me. Far better than I.

An still I held her, for she seemed unwilling to let go herself. Even as the other girl arrived…even as Sondra walked off towards the showers peeling the clothes from her lusciously sensuous body and muttering ‘bout what had happened. The nightmare had held 5 of us….an all of us had shared it. I shivered once more. A tug of me arms about the slight body, trying to ward of the walls that closed in round me. Voices laughing in me head, a not so subtle reminder of the closeness of reality an fantasy.

I kissed her on the forehead, forgoing the thing I wanted most. Denying the needs of me body for the greater good. If her lips were to touch mine it would be because she wished it…not I….I had forced me self once upon her once. I would not do so again if only to prove to god above that I could live me life worthy of his blessings. I would not stand in the way of Sable an Michael. No, that would have been wrong. If I really needed to indulge me body all I had to do wuz follow Sondra into the shower. I wuz sure that linny an her would find a way to share with me.

Thoughts were treacherous for their ability to move you along paths that lead to poor decisions. I could admire now the way Linny an Sondra could engage in such a freewheeling love affair. How each could pour our their zest of life in the arms of so many others an still have enough love for one another. Eighteen months in this place and I wuz changing…me outlook vastly different than the first day that Linny had propositioned me an only later a more experienced girl had told me what she had really wanted. The disgust I had felt then…an now….now I knew better I suppose. Still, it wuzn’t the way I could live me life. I had to find me own way, an right now that wuz moving through the maze of emotions and desires that had to do with the person whose warm body straddled me own an still held me tight.

“Michael, as much as I want to kiss you here” A single finger upon her soft pink lips. “I would have been doing it for more than I sense you are willing to freely give. I might ask for too much. I like boys, I think…but I like my own sex, an I like you as well. But I don’t wanna get tween sable an you as much as I long for the comfort of a lovers arms an to take you might very well be wrong. I jus don’t know….I don’t…..But I don’t want to hear you say no, or fear of me germs…or see it as sum thing you wouldn’t have a problem with. I want you to want to enjoy the pleasure of me arms about you. I think I can be good, better even as you have been to me. You of all people deserve nothing better. “ Watching those green emeralds for the signs that might tell me which way the wind blew, an if I had things right tween Sable an her. I swear I wuz rambling now…incoherent at best. Probably about to make a real mess of things…still.

The grin slowly coming cross me face. “An I feel dirty as well, like the germs of that nightmare need to come off. So now is not the time….frankly I need a shower a nice long hot shower with lots of soap.” I paused, not knowing if I really wanted to take this plunge….for….but I did. I wanted it and only in the asking would I ever know. “an I could use someone to scrub me back…an I could do that as well….soap, water, massage, an hugs.” It would have to be enough if it happened at all. Sondra had the right idea…get clean or at least feel as close as one could after such a nightmare.

"How could I have been so fucking stupid!" Sondra stomped towards the showers, anger propelling her the entire way. Anger at herself for her inability to protect the woman she loved more than life itself, for her inability to defend the other girls against the hideous creature that violated them.

A laundry basket was kicked aside, dumping soiled towels and wash rags onto the ground A nearby garbage can was hurled across the room, scattering pieces of trash all over the floor, before it smacked against a mirror with a loud crash. Glass shattered, fragments flying all about as the furious blonde strode on by without a single thought of the damage she was causing on her way to the showers...

The knob turned, and the shower kicked on, the cold water washing away the filth that covered her body and the tears that stained her face. No amount of water would wash away the shame and guilt that Sondra felt inside. Slowly, gently, Sondra dropped to the ground, arms tightly hugging her knees, head drooped down between her legs. Fresh tears, brought on by a mix of shame and self-loathing, streamed down her face. The shower poured its ice cold water down upon the guilt-ridden blonde, washing away the tears that just kept on coming. Sondra' entire body shook as she sobbed soundlessly.

Never had she felt so helpless, so impotent. These girls were her friends, her sisters, and she saw it as her mission...her sole purpose to protect them at all cost, and once again she, Sondra the Protector, the Fearless Warrior, had failed in that mission. As far as she was concerned, there was no greater failure than that...

she blushed at Cassie to what she said about her name and smiled "thanks and really was it really a dream cause it sure didn't feel like it to me.." she would notice Cassie and then looked at Michael once more and then at Cassie again as she says to her self "someone's in love.."

she giggled softly until she notice Sondra running off to the showers she looked angry she thought she should go see what was wrong but she didn't know Sondra that well and not only that she was already taken by Linny as she frown "guess she feels the same way I feel about this.."

Carcosa felt so far away now, like a childhood memory that may have just been a dream. Yet, it have been frighteningly real and their bodies bore the strain to prove it. The impossible corridors, the angles that defied logic and reason, the shapes that laughed at normal time and space, that made geometry and physics seem powerless.

Yet it had all melted away into normality. Could it be a delusion? But such a wild and vivid hallucination be shared to such detail by all of them?

Again I listened to her though I uttered nothing for a time looking back at sable for a moment. the mention of something between me and sable struck me as strange. sure we were both the same height and sure we were both in the same room but, beyond that? I might have forgiven her consciously but, deep in my mind I knew no matter what the fact she'd raped me would be heavy on my mind. I still had nightmares of the event now and then. Though even still my eyes looked into Cassie's all that showed was what I was feeling at the moment. The regard of Cassie as my red haired angel.

"Sable & me? She's just my friend that's all..."

My eyes showed anger just then. I was holding a grudge against my friend. Something that didn't suit me and even moire I was blushing at the thought ob being sable's lover none of it made sense to me but, I knew one thing Something that greatly sickened me. I wanted cassie to try & do what sable had when we'd first met. no doubt it was just as powerful a feeling as her own.

"You already are better than me... You embrace your humanity; I can barely stomach it. I'd uhm I'd be honored to wash your back though if you'd allow me to."

((get this odd feeling we should end this and move to the common rooms when linny gets back ;^^))

This blonde haired waif of a girl wuz much too good. In that moment as I looked in her eyes an saw the strange mix of emotion I knew she could be trusted. There wuz pain that ran deep in those eys of hers, an the desire for more, for the good an pure things of life. For …. Love. Doubts ‘gain to vanish in me own mind. Doubts about Love an happiness an all manner of good things. Still the pain of what I had done made me want to be slow, take it easy. Make sure this time. I did not want another that would cheat on me. Not even once.

Reaching upwards I brushed a strand of sweat matted hair behind her ear so I could see the angel above me more clearly. The eyes are a window to the soul they say and her soul was pure if not troubled. I could feel its call. But I wuz not better than her, we were….jus different.

“I’m sorry… I didn’t realize, not bouts the two of you…maybe I’ve been here too long already, I mean roommates seem to mean sum thing deeper most of the time. My fault that…I suppose I should now better an all…I kinda assumed…an yah now what they say ‘bout that an all.” The smile genuine as it could get. I liked her….the more I got to know the more I knew she wuz real an honest an genuine, not hiding behind pretenses. Not looking for a fantasy in the people she met. A kindred soul. If friends we were to be I could be that….if sum thing more…well, it had been a month…a long nightmare of a month an when the school had cleared her room in our suite I had cried me self all weekend. It wuz lke the final nail upon the coffin of our relationship. And still nobody said a thing.

“I….am….not like this forward all the time…please believe me…. I would like you there, maybe it will be safer, at least I know it would feel that way. But here….in the gym or…or my rooms showers or yours. I…I don’t want to press…I don’t wanna like force you to anything. Wherever you would be more comfortable.”

I knew what I would like. Modesty an a past life at an all girls school had left me not wanting to hang out in public showers. It causes me no end to strife when the girls noticed the goody two shoes wuz a sporting piercings in really private places an wuz utterly bare across her mound. Like I could explain it…or the black leather collar I could not remove. Detention…an then I woke up naked on a hard floor. Each time sum thing new. An everybody thought I wuz really two faced. But I would face the music, public places could inhibit the worst behavior in sum….especially me.

I smiled, awaiting her answer as I absently twirled the strands of her hair in me fingers. Strands that smelled of coconut…. A pure smell not unlike the strawberries an vanilla I used on me own.

I looked to her with a bright smile as I simply released her from my grip. I nodded to her and placed a hand on my chin tapping it gently as I wondered which would be the best choice my mind shifted to Sable. that anger was still there but, with that anger had been a caring I didn't want to acknowledge and that my face hadn't shown nor would my eyes or actions even my voice hid the conflicting emotions of my caring for two girls at the same time. It was a bitter feeling to suddenly care this much for two people I barely knew. Caring enough to taker my mind off my fears.

My thoughts shifted back to the what this choice meant. A public experience seemed traditional in this place. But... I didn't want that. Nor did I want anything that would make her assume I was needy thus her room was out of the question.,. and my room... My room which I shared with sable... I couldn't allow that either... I didn't know why but I just couldn't do such a thing in the shower I shared with the blue haired girl that was so near.

"I'm not sure I'll want to shower after I see a bed. Would you mind here in that case?"

So it came down to how tired my body was still the 'nightmare' had drained me more than a nightmare should have. It was my hint that it hadn't been a dream but reality... my real proof would be if Cassie really had a collar around her neck and piercings on her chest. Something I couldn't know unless I had seen her naked before.

An enigma, that is what she wuz. As much as I did not expect her answer I would not renege. An frankly she was right. I could easily curl up in a ball upon me bed….best though if there wuz one to hold onto an keep the dreams away. At least the public shower would keep me honest. And that wuz best. I would not use her, now or ever. If it wuz a friend she wanted I would be that an relish the chance to be that. Sum one to talk with, to get hugs. In life it wuz enough. It had to be enough. I wuz not like others that could go from bed to bed.

“yur so right. Thanks….” There wuz a time taking me clothes off an going in that shower would have been tough…even now…but I would whether the storm….well enough I reckoned. Squaring me shoulders I stood, smiling at her an then giving her a hug, nice an safe with our clothes on, nothing that nobody could say anything ‘bout. Once more the smell of coconuts engulfed me nose. A warm safe smell. Much like she wuz. A rock in the rolling turbulence of life. Perhaps I saw what I wanted too, but did that really matter?

“I like your shampoo, it leaves such a warm fragrance in yur hair….really….perhaps its silly but I notice things like that. Like the way you favor one leg o’er the other. I hope I am not intruding…jus shut me up an send me home. Its ok….I jus can talk an talk….but I like to hear bout you as well….”

Shoes bounced into the now open locker, me newest pare of woman’s saucony joggers. Best shoes you can get, make you think yur floating on air itself. Socks…plain white cotton peds. The rest well…I breathed deep an then continued. I ran in shorts….simple shorts with nothing under um, I mean it was hot an humid an nothing messes with yah more that sweat socked cotton at the end of a run. Frankly if I could have done without the bra, well…I might have. But good support is necessary when yah get to a certain bust size, an I wuz there. The things yah learn when yah pick up a new habit. I let the shorts fall using me foot to toss um in the locker…I swear I could feel the rising heat. It wuz like Micheals eyes were on me…looking real careful like. I let the bra fall, me back to her. An carefully wrapped the towel round me bust.

Shampoo….soap…..an the puff ball. Long ago the need for a razor had disappeared from me life. A small price to pay for being hairless now.

“I’ll met yah in the shower”….the yellow slip of paper ignored that sat upon the floor. Towel discarded at the last possible moment. Modesty wuz not to be o’er rated. Much to me surprise I found Sondra then….muttering in a ball beneath the pounding water. I could not leave her thus…not like this.

Crouching down, the cool water pounding me shoulder I brought me arms ‘bout her….
“its ok..no…not to blame…I tried to….an failed….yes…not so different … not so at all….an to think what I have thought…yur a good girl Sondra….very noble….”

“Linny….Sondra needs you” I yelled, realizing that for the first time this girl wuz not so different as I . that as much as I did not lead the life they did. Did not rail against the admin an cause all sorts of mischief. For the first time I wuz seeing a side of her I had never seen ‘fore.
“Michael, sable….tell her…tell its not her fault….really….” I no longer cared about the glitter of gold…the lack of fur…the collar about me neck. I opened me arms to the gathering crowd…a crowd that shared a dark secret…a nightmare that more an more wuz not like any nightmare I had ever had ‘fore.

I smiled at first; but that smile led to an awkward stare as Cassie moved to a locker and began to remove her clothes. I watched as one garment after another fell from her form unable to take my eyes away... until that is her bra slipped off and I saw it's size. I nearly cowered into a ball of insecurity at that point. I looked down at my own chest. I was just barely more curved than a washboard chested woman. I blushed deeply looking at the ground until she was in the showers.

I walked to my usual locker looking at it then down at my uniform.

I never changed out of my body suit... why am I in my uniform?

I thought as I swung open my locker; I saw my body suit sitting here I would have put it and shook my head as I let my skirt slip down and unbuttoned my blouse placing them within gathering my towel; soap; shampoo(Cassie seemed to like my taste in it.), a pumice stone, a nail brush and a bag of other cleaning tools. it was a germaphobic thing. I knew I'd never get over it completely but, I could probably weaken it's grip on my life enough to be considered normal.

A new pair of panties and a new bra; no matter how small it was, were held in my container; I didn't wear cotton unless i was going to a normal class, other times I wore a satin blend or velvet; kinky for a person like me I know, I walked into the showers still partially clad and wrapped in my large towel from shoulders to toes seeing what Cassie was doing then eyeing Sondra.

"There's no way I could say it is her fault, we all wanted to help the others but, we couldn't we did all we could. I didn't even have a moment to defend myself."

Sable walked in the locker room and started to get dress as she punch the locker hard "damn it I should have been the one to help Michael but as always im the weaker one..."

it has always been like that even back at home everytime she was in trouble it was her older sister Kim that would help her and now here she was thinking she could help her new room mate to get away form that evil thing and yet she couldn't and what was worst someone else helped Michael and it looked like Micheal might have feelings for this girl then again she knew that Micheal didn't have feelings for Sable after what she did to her when they first met she wouldn't blame her if she hated the blue haired girl for the rest of her life "damn it Sable what the hell were you thinking back there stupid stupid stupid..." she kept on chanting that word softly to her self

((Hrm...Had a perfectly good post lined up, too. Looks like I'm going to have to modify it somewhat... ))

A sad little sigh escaped Sondra's lip as Sondra, her body still shaking a bit, wrapped her arms around Cassie, her head leaning on the compassionate red-haired girl's shoulder. Tears trailed down her face and mingled with the cold water pouring down on Cassie's shoulder. "I don't know how noble I feel at the moment, Cassie. You say that you have tried and failed, but at least you tried. Me, I failed by doing nothing, and that to me is the greatest failure of all. I'm not so sure that makes me a noble person."

Then Michael showed up, and Sondra shook her head as she listened to the smaller blonde's words.

"You guys may have done your best...I didn't do anything. All I did was just stand there like a bafoon and flap my jaw at that over-grown octopus, as if talking the ugly little fuck to death was going to make him stop. I let overconfidence and stubborn pride get in the way of sound judgment and clear thinking, and because of that, I failed all of you."